My child plays with an imaginary friend. Should I be concerned? (2024)

FAQs

My child plays with an imaginary friend. Should I be concerned? ›

In general, imaginary friendships are a normal part of social development and will fade away over time. It is important to discuss any concerns you have with your pediatrician, particularly if: You have other developmental concerns about your child, especially involving speech, talking patterns, or social interactions.

Having an imaginary friend is a normal and healthy part of childhood play. Having one has even shown benefits in childhood development. If your child has an imaginary friend, it's totally OK. They can grow out of it in their own time as they stop needing the skills that their companion is teaching them.

Although creating an imaginary friend is a normal, healthy experience in a child's development, there are times when it may be cause for concern. “Children who have experienced trauma may develop an imaginary friend as part of dissociation, which is a way to disconnect from the reality of the stressful event.

Initially, you should support your child as they create a relationship with their invisible friend. They'll feel respected and loved as you ask them questions about what their made-up companion is doing and play along with their stories.

According to a 2005 study from the American Psychological Association, imaginary friends often surface around age 4 and can last well into school age—around 9 years old. “Most imaginary friendships wane as the child becomes more interested and invested in having a real-life social peer group,” Hafeez explains.

In general, imaginary friendships are a normal part of social development and will fade away over time. It is important to discuss any concerns you have with your pediatrician, particularly if: You have other developmental concerns about your child, especially involving speech, talking patterns, or social interactions.

It is important to continually evaluate a child's social support network, well-being, and overall development. Imaginary friends are not a diagnostic tool for mental illness and are not believed to be an early sign of psychosis or hallucination. Experts view imaginary friends as a normal and healthy part of childhood.

Other professionals such as Marjorie Taylor feel imaginary friends are common among school-age children and are part of normal social-cognitive development. Part of the reason people believed children gave up imaginary companions earlier than has been observed is related to Piaget's stages of cognitive development.

Make-believe friends give you insight into your child's inner world and your child's likes, dislikes and tastes. Children with imaginary friends can be more social and less shy than other children, and they might show more empathy in their play with other children.

Childhood imaginary companions (ICs) are common and a normal part of child development, but certain aspects of ICs are also connected to adversity and dissociation.

Is it normal for an only child to have an imaginary friend? ›

An imaginary companion typically serves as a companion to the child and plays a significant role in their life, especially for only children who may experience more loneliness compared to other children.

Studies show that as many as 50 percent of young children have an imaginary companion, whether completely pretend or in the form of a doll or stuffed animal like Monkey. Some children also develop complex imaginary worlds that psychologists call paracosms, though these are much less common.

Past research shows that autistic children can and do create imaginary companions (ICs), and that these ICs resemble those that neurotypical children create.

By age 4-5 their growing imagination can blur the lines between their real and invented worlds. As children mature and gain more social skills, they slowly move away from their imaginary world that is familiar and comfortable as they learn about the real world.

You might assume that only very young children have imaginary friends, but research has shown that older kids have imaginary pals, too. “It's common with children up to age 12,” says Dr. Eshleman. Imaginary friends can be figments of your child's imagination.

Having an imaginary friend is quite common for children ages 3-13. Most of the time, a child admits that their imaginary friend only exists in their make-believe world, not in the real world. Having an imaginary friend can be a sign of a vividly imaginative child who is trying to understand the world better.

Dr. Eshleman says not to worry. “Children might use an imaginary friend to replay or work through things they experience in life,” she explains. “It's a way to help them practice social skills and process things they see.

Imaginary friends grow out of healthy, active imaginations. Imaginary friends help children express feelings and practise social skills. As children get older, they usually stop playing with imaginary friends.

Over the last few years, however, research has revealed that this form of pretend play serves an important and ultimately beneficial function. Kids who have imaginary friends typically have better communication skills, increased creativity, and even a higher self-esteem than kids who lack imaginary playmates.

Whitaker said parents should not be concerned if a child does not have an imaginary friend. "Not all children develop ICs and there are many other ways to engage in symbolic play and foster the development of social and cognitive skills," she said.